A Conglomeration of Inane Ramblings

Is Ann Coulter the Skip Bayliss of national political journalists? Some of you know Skip, the idiot ESPN talking head who attempts to illogically declare that the rest of the Cleveland Cavaliers are a good supporting cast for Lebron James, and that Larry Hughes could have been Lebron's Scottie Pippen if Lebron was a better player. These opinions are so dumb and ignorant that they could only be made by someone who sells out all sense of dignity to get their face in the public eye. Ann Coulter writes political opinion pieces seething with so much hate, that I can't fathom how someone could naturally be like this. I just have to believe at this point she, like Skip, simply looks at a situation and purposefully takes the most outlandish view and then argues it vehemently simply to get her name in the paper and face on TV. She actually wrote a piece deriding Obama's well received (even by many Republicans) approach to racism. Somehow she managed to tie in some very attenuated story about Obama's grandparents and their worries over getting mugged and use this to say Obama shouldn't be speaking about racism. What.The.Fuck. She's either the world's biggest snatch or one of the world's leading attention whores. This bitch and anyone who agrees with her are what's wrong with America at this point. She's not even Republican, she's her own thing. She spouts off about Christian values, yet spews more hate than anyone I've ever seen. She's not even respectful in her disagreement, instead attacking rather than discussing. How Republicans can even allow these people to be associated with their party is beyond me. All it does is give an independent voters a reason to hate the party. Likewise, the Democrats have their wackos too, but it seems as though the Republican wackos have been out in full force for this election. I guess they figure that Bush has ruined any real chance of the Republicans winning so they might as well make asses out of themselves.

And what is it about Obama and "controversy" thus far? I mean, McCain recently made peace with Jerry Falwell, therefore by the logic used between Obama and his preacher, shouldn't McCain's peace being made with Falwell mean that McCain accepts Falwell's statements that the US is at fault for Katrina and 9/11 for being sinners? Isn't that just as bad as saying "Goddamned America" in so many words? What about the fact that McCain's family traces back to Caroll County Mississippi, which was widely regarded as one of the most racially charged counties in MS history? His grandfather even served as the county sheriff. Obviously having roots in such a racist place must mean that McCain was raised with those same racist values and therefore believes those same racist values right? What about Hilary marrying a morally corrupt man like Bill, who would cheat on his wife with interns in the Oval Office? Obviously she shares his same corrupt values if she was willing to marry him. Why aren't these relationships the subject of endless debates?

I don't actually believe any of these relationships should have a bearing on who you vote for president, but don't let the bullshit sway you. In the end, Obama's refusal to "play the political game" is probably gonna cost him, and that's sad. It's pretty pathetic that a large portion of the American public can so easily be distracted from the real issues without even realizing it. Vote based on your Iraq position or your economic position or your alternative fuels position, but don't vote based on the bullshit political games that have turned off voters for years. Why do you think Obama has such a strong young following? He doesn't play the bullshit games, he tells it like it is, and doesn't feel the need to point out that in 1995 Hilary didn't put her hand over her heart during a National Anthem and therefore is not a "true American". I fucking hate politics.

Now there are people throughout MS calling for a raise in the state's driving age from 16 to 18. Seriously? Let's count the reasons this is an awful idea. 1) MS has virtually NO public transportation to speak of, and therefore parents would be forced to be chauffeurs for their children during some of their most active years as HS juniors and seniors - football practice, SATs, graduation parties, cheerleading practice, hanging out with friends...I'm sure parents would just be stoked to have to hold their kids' hands the whole time. 2) I think it's a poorly thought out idea to have a kid head off to college a couple of weeks after getting their drivers' license, but that's just me. Look, I prefer not to drive, and rarely drove in Portland, but it's simply a must in MS and other rural states. I want to get back to a city where I can park my car for days on end and not spend $60 in gas per week, but alas the job market is forcing me to drive by keeping me in Starkville. It's not my fault that I'm using up all the oil, blame the law firms in the cities I want to live who refuse to hire me.

In other news, one of MLK's closest confidants was convicted of forcing his (at the time) teenage daughter to have sex with him. Obviously since this guy was so close to MLK, MLK was an advocate for incestuous relations.

I still haven't grasped how so many Republicans seem so upset about McCain. He's the "lesser of 3 evils" and they are already planning on doing better in 2012. I mean, seriously America, what the fuck is wrong with a president who is closer to the middle than to the far right or far left? It's like Americans pick a side and refuse to compromise. Weren't we all taught to compromise as a 5 year old? I mean, I always wanted to only be Donatello when playing Ninja Turtles, but sometimes someone else wanted to be Donatello, so I would let them be Donatello for a Ninja Turtle v. Transformers v. G.I. Joe battle or 2, that way we BOTH got to be Donatello. Obviously in a perfect world we would have both been Donatello the entire time, but since we both wanted to be Donatello, we compromised and split custody. Apparently as you get older, you get worse at compromising.

How about the American Family Association petitioning Marriott to remove the pay-per-view porn from their TV options? Does it really bother people that much that someone might be willing to pay for porn in a private hotel room that they feel the need to spend their precious time asking for them to remove the porn option instead of doing something constructive like educating their children on safe sex or playing catch in the backyard and being a true parent to their kid? Or how about generally instilling the desired morals into your child so that when they are faced with the decision to pay for that porn they pass it up? If we take away all temptations, then do morals even exist? It just seems to me there are a lot of things that could be done that are infinitely more important and worthwhile than not having to worry about a ppv porn option the next time you stay at a Marriott.

Finally, I love the MS Senator commercials in which the candidates say "I am pro-life and I am pro gun". Sounds kinda funny when said back-to-back like that, doesn't it?

Sorry if any of my ramblings left out key components that make me look foolish. Sometimes I am isolated from intelligent conversation when spending 40 hours a week in a mini storage office all alone and my imagination begins to run wild.

The Tycoon