The Birds and the Bees

I have big news, but it must wait while I first relay this splendid story. So recently Other Kitty has been acting like she's ready to get back into the single kitty scene. Apparently she's looking to move on from her disastrous first litter of kittens. So this morning I am laying in bed enjoying some ESPN and some rest, and I hear a strange low moaning/meowing noise. Now Other Kitty likes to talk a lot and can make some weird sounds, but this was something I hadn't heard before. So I climb out of bed and walk into the living room only to find Lint and Other Kitty engaged in doggystyle sex in the middle of the living room floor! There was a brief moment where my eyes met all 4 of their eyes before Lint dismounted and frantically bolted towards the front door and began begging to be let out. I was flabbergasted, as I'd never seen cats humping, and Lint supposedly has no balls. And just like a woman, Other Kitty follows him over by the front door and begins rolling on the floor in a flirting manner, while Lint being the ball-less pimp womanizer he is ignores her and continues to beg to be let outside. After letting Lint out and gathering my thoughts, I couldn't decide if Lint was embarrassed to be caught with an obvious slutty kitty like Other Kitty, or if he and Other Kitty have an ongoing intimate relationship and was caught in the throws of passion, but he is now attempting to hide his emotion so as to maintain his air of indifference and coldness. I am going to be watching future interactions closely in hopes of getting to the bottom of the nature of their relationship. If you wondered what it looked like:



As you can tell from her facial impression, Lint is obviously not doing it for Other Kitty. Maybe it's the lack of balls?

And now for the big news...::drum roll::...THE MUSINGS OF A MINI STORAGE TYCOON HAS MADE GOOGLE!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! See for yourself! Upon learning this, I literally nearly broke down in tears as I realized having finally made it. It's been a long hard climb from a blog that was read by only a handful of early supporters to a full-fledged national phenomenon. And that's before we even cover the US with t-shirts.

While browsing for opportunities to expand my empire on Craigslist, I found a job posting that seemed to be speaking directly to me!

The Heekin Law Firm seeks an associate attorney with an entrepreneurial spirit who wants to use legal expertise, professional judgment, client input, and electronic evidence and litigation management tools to solve business disputes and fraud-related claims. The ideal candidate has 3-5 years of experience in complex commercial or insurance defense cases, solid grades from good schools, and experience on law review or as a judicial extern/clerk. Strong research and writing skills are a must. Experience arguing motions, as a second chair, and using Summation, CaseMap, and Sanction desired as well. Any past lives or after-hours spent blogging, podcasting, filmmaking, videoblogging, reporting or using a Six Sigma approach will be rewarded here. Send resume, writing sample, and references to Julie Smith, The Heekin Law Firm, 808 S.W. Third Ave., Suite 540, Portland, OR 97204; fax 503-200-5135, or email via reply to this ad.

http://portland.craigslist.org/mlt/lgl/664119627.html

While I may lack the experience, I think an application with an entire printout of blog entries might get me an interview.

And finally, anyone who wants 2 Radiohead tickets, I got pavilion seats for the show outside of Washington, D.C. on May 11. I figured I would have some kind of decision by now, but instead I am looking at Day #21 on the "Will The Tycoon Get A Job From The Patent Office That Allows Him To Expand His Empire In The Mid-Atlantic". Here's hoping that I get my money back from Craiglist. And if anyone has me a miracle ticket for either Atlanta or Dallas, I'd take it in a heartbeat.

The author of the #2 website when Googling for "mini storage tycoon",
The Tycoon